A Mother's guide

A Mother's guide for helping physically delayed children play with personal tips and toy reviews.

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Acclaimed composer visits hospital, gets more than expected


A Seattle Times Author, Nicole Brodeur, wrote a great article about a recent visit to the Children's Hospital in Seattle by Alan Menken. It includes a video and pictures of his visit. I was fortunate enough to take Kai out of his room for a short time to listen. He absolutely loved it. He has not been out of his room since July 3rd so it really was a great opportunity. Mr. Menken was so nice and I am very glad he was able to come and brighten some faces. I know it is hard for others to see sometimes what these kids go through but I hope he knows he made a difference that day.

Originally published July 21, 2011
Nicole Brodeur

Acclaimed composer visits hospital, gets more than expected

The kids may not know who wrote the songs for "Beauty and the Beast," "The Little Mermaid" and "Aladdin" — the musical opening this week at the 5th Avenue Theatre — but they sure know the songs.
Seattle Times staff columnist


Patients take them into their rooms, their families into the waiting area.

"They are usually the first ones to be taken," one nurse told me.

Which boded well for composer Alan Menken when he walked in the other day.

The kids may not know who wrote the songs for "Beauty and the Beast," "The Little Mermaid" and "Aladdin" — the musical opening this week at the 5th Avenue Theatre — but they sure know the songs.

And yet, for all the logistics surrounding Menken's visit, some things weren't to be planned, like when patient Shannon Wallace sat down at the piano to play for a bit, unknowingly forcing the eight-time Oscar winner to cool his heels on a couch.
While playing piano at Seattle Children's this week, Alan Menken, left, meets hospital visitor Pulou Alesana-Tuipala, 5.
Menken listened intently as Wallace, 16, her IV drip beside her, played a swirling melody that she had composed herself.

"Reminds me of Joni Mitchell," Menken told Wallace when she finished. "Sounds like 'Blue.' "

Then Menken sat down to play some things he had composed.

"I wrote a lot of the those Disney things," Menken said casually.

Wallace, who has cystic fibrosis and has been at the hospital for eight days, was stunned.

"He's a legend," she said. "I think it's cool that he's here and that he would devote his time."

While the adults in the room stood smiling and spellbound, the kids did what kids will do: Two boys — one of them in an arm cast — ran between a fort of cushions and the Xbox console. A baby watched his mother blow bubbles. A boy in a wheelchair, and another with a breathing machine, were parked not far from the piano to listen.

"Music helps to relax us, music can calm us, music can make us feel safe when we're scared," said Dave Knott, the hospital's music therapist. "This music that (Menken) has written is so meaningful to the kids. It's the music that they love."

Menken invited one little girl to sit beside him on the bench, and taught her a few notes of accompaniment as he played requests: The theme from "Beauty and the Beast," "Under the Sea," and, of course, "A Whole New World," from "Aladdin."
Composer Alan Menken, right, and hospital visitor Pulou Alesana-Tuipala, 5, left, play a piano at Seattle Children's.

"This is what I wanted him to experience," said Mateo Messina, who has been playing piano here every month for more than a decade. He also composes and produces an annual benefit concert that has raised almost $1 million.

"What else can I play for you guys?" Menken asked.
Play video: Raw video: Composer Alan Menken at Seattle Children's Hospital
Rich and famous people do nice things all the time. Donating money, visiting places like this. It comes with the territory of doing well and being known; the expectation to give back is always there. Always.
But this concert in the playroom seemed to be more than Menken expected.

He walked out after about an hour at the piano and released a deep and sober sigh.

"That was great," he said. "So heart-rending."

Menken knows suffering and loss, especially that of his friend Howard Ashman, who wrote the lyrics for all of "The Little Mermaid," and some for "Aladdin." (Those that weren't included in the film have been restored, with their storyline, into the musical.)

Menken, who turns 62 today, met Ashman in New York in 1979.

Not long after they won the 1990 Oscar for Best Original Song for "The Little Mermaid," Ashman told Menken he was HIV positive. They went on to write and win two more Oscars for "Beauty and the Beast" and had begun writing songs for "Aladdin" when Ashman died in 1991. He won a posthumous Oscar in 1992 for Best Original Song for "Beauty and the Beast."

"He was brilliant, very considerate, sensitive, demanding, temperamental and larger than life," Menken said of his friend. "Had he lived, he would have been a major contributor to our culture. Major."
And he would have been in Seattle this week for the opening.

"It feels amazing and joyful and sad," Menken said. "I watch these moments and I think, 'God, Howard's not here.' I still feel it very strongly; the connection."

On the way back to his hotel, Menken and I talked about all kinds of things. Family. The Seattle theater scene. Then, after a pause, this:

"What do you know about cystic fibrosis?" he asked.

I said I knew there wasn't a cure. That it was life-threatening.

Neither of us said much after that.

We pulled up to Menken's hotel, and for just a moment, he sat in the passenger seat, distracted.

"That was a good thing you did," I told him.

"Yeah... " he said, quietly. "It haunts you."

All the more reason to write songs that can light up a movie. Funny songs. Happy songs. So happy that kids will want to take them into their hospital rooms, and keep them.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Part 1: Birth to 6 months, Concerns arise


Kai Samuel Lucas was born on April 7th, 2009. He was born with no complications at 9lbs 3oz and 21.5 inches long. He was such a big boy! We were released from the hospital the next day. I brought Kai back to the hospital for a weight check a couple days later. He had lost more weight than usual, so the nurses told me to feed him every couple hours and sent us home. We went through that same process for a couple of weeks. I kept trying to feed him, but he kept wanting to sleep. It didn’t seem too alarming to the hospital staff, so I wasn’t that worried. I was not breastfeeding. It was too difficult to monitor how much he was eating by breastfeeding, so I switched to formula at three weeks. The ABC clinic where I was taking Kai did not see infants after they were two weeks old, so I had to monitor his food intake until his two month checkup.
Kai’s two month checkup went fine and it seemed like he was on track. His four month checkup went the same. He was rolling over and hitting all his developmental markers. As Kai approached five months old things started to slow down. Kai stopped rolling over and was still struggling with little to no head control. My neighbor brought over another five month old for us to meet, and I knew right away that Kai was different. Kai was my first child, so the comparison with another child his age really brought his developmental delays to light. My neighbor was standing in my living room with this little boy sitting in her arm holding his pacifier in his mouth. At the same time I was sitting on the couch cradling Kai in my arms like a newborn.
After I realized there might be a problem with Kai’s development, I started asking doctors about it. I soon discovered that it was not going to be easy to get someone to listen to me. This would be a theme in our life for months. I first went to his pediatrician to raise concerns.  Medical professionals reassured me that he was fine. I decided to take him to a different office to see a new pediatrician. When I told that doctor that I had concerns with his development, she told me that (without even touching Kai!) she is not concerned unless the children aren’t walking at 18 months. That is just absurd! Was she saying that if Kai could not even hold his head up or roll over at a year that would be okay?
I thought about where to take him next and decided on my family physician.  Then I heard about a local office that offered an early intervention program with physical and occupational therapy for infants in the area. I called the office and asked them to evaluate Kai. They agreed to do it without a doctors request. They told me that the evaluations they do usually come from doctors’ offices, but I told them I couldn’t get a doctor to say something was wrong. It was frustrating, and I was thrilled when they agreed to see him.

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Media Player

Kai absolutely loves to watch movies now, though he was never interested in them when he was younger. I played them on the TV and he would not pay any attention to it at all. Kai also never paid attention to anything very far away like pictures or wall decor. When Kai had his tracheostomy placed, I could not hold him for 7 days. This was torture for me. All I did before was hold him. I had no way to entertain him besides standing next to him while he lay in his bed. I always felt badly leaving him because he would just lay there with a picture on the ceiling and a light up fish tank next to him, that I think he didn't even really care for. One day I was messing with my iPod and downloaded a Netflix app and thought maybe he would watch a movie from the iPod. I taped it to one of his crib toys, and he was smiling away. After a few weeks of using the iPod we knew just how much he loved to watch movies, so his grandparents bought him a media player.

It is so great for Kai. We initially thought about getting a flat screen to put above his bed or something but I wanted him to be able to watch movies from any position. It wouldn't be good for Kai to stay on his back for long periods throughout the day. Kai currently spends the majority of his time in bed and is rotated on each side and back every 2 to 3 hours. We needed something that we could move around with him. The media player's screen swivels all the way around and forward so Kai can watch his movies on his side or back.

Kai's grandparents also bought us the cords used to hook the media player up to my iPod so he can watch movies using Netflix too. Now Kai has favorites and everything. I guess I just never got a screen close enough for him to really be able to watch. I feel so much better leaving him for awhile to eat or get things done knowing he is finally being entertained.